The whole point, after all, is to refute the tradition of misogyny that has long endured without serious challenge. I think as a corrective to this interpretation, a lot of people have come to use the word “rape” in nontraditional contexts. I think part of this, too, is that patriarchy remains so dominant in the organization of our culture that a lot of wrongdoing by men has long been taken for granted. Part of this, I think, must derive from a survival instinct-one way to resist feeling broken down by something is to frame it as incapable of breaking you down at all. It wasn ’ t that bad, not compared to how horrific it could have been, they say. Some survivors of sexual assault/exploitation will minimize their experience by comparing it to more extreme abuse that others have endured. How should I respond to my friends? How should I classify what happened? I just want to know what the appropriate terminology is, correct those two friends if necessary, then re-bury this vat of toxic waste memories.
